My wife was reading one of my columns this week and pointed out that I had made a mistake while referring to the team that plays football in Washington as the Redskins.
“No I didn’t,” I countered, “I’m calling that franchise a name that sounds like a real team instead of one that conjures up something that is to be determined later. Until they rename that team, they will be referred to as the Redskins by me.”
She furrowed her brow, gave me one of those looks only a family member could use to say more than anyone else could with words, and then returned to a crossword puzzle she had been solving.
I’m not sure if others will think I’m ill informed or still in the mode of calling the Chargers San Diego or the Raiders Oakland. I’ve adjusted those as the teams moved, without reservation. If the Chargers are now the Los Angeles Chargers or the Raiders the Las Vegas Raiders, fine. I’ll adjust.
But there are some things I refuse to adjust to in addition to the football team in Washington. It was decided a few years ago that it was incorrect to refer to a baseball player who drove in multiple runs as having RBI’s. Some kid with a pocket protector on his shirt and coke bottle glasses determined that the proper way to say that is runs batted in, and therefore if we say RBI’s we are in fact saying runs batted ins. Therefore, it should henceforth be said properly that a player who drove in two or more runs as accomplishing RBI.
Screw you.
That sounds horrible.
Do you know that architects design buildings and bridges not always in perfect measurements but instead fudge numbers to create what is more pleasing to the eye? They do. So, when Buster Posey drives in five runs I’m not going to ever say he had five RBI. The guy had 5 RBI’s because it sounds better.
When the Redskins rename their team the Senators, Yellow Jackets or Horn Frogs, I will quickly adopt that name to refer to Daniel Snyder’s squad. But, if they aren’t capable of coming up with a name and want to be called the Washington Generic Brand, I’m not biting.
The inability to name their team is reflected on how their squad plays on the field too.
On opening day this year, they were behind the Philadelphia Eagles by double-digits before most games had even changed ball possession. Yet, somehow, while the Eagles were counting their chips and high-fiving each on the sideline, Philadelphia began suffering a series of injuries that opened the door to the suddenly inspired REDSKINS and Washington scored the final 27 points that added up to a 27-17 victory.
Since that Redskins win last month, they have come up short in three straight games and have not won another point spread decision.
This week, they host the Los Angeles Rams, a team that opened their season with a victory over the Dallas Cowboys and have tacked on two more wins over the past three weekends. The Rams come to Washington embroiled in a tough division race with three capable opponents, the undefeated Seattle Seahawks, defending NFC Champion San Francisco 49ers and up-and-coming Arizona Cardinals.
In other words, the Rams can’t take a day off and expect to stay in the thick of the hunt in the NFC Western Division.
But, that can’t hide the fact that the Rams think there is little chance of a team that can’t get their name right is going to be able to outscore them this Sunday at FedExField.
Like so many things in Washington these days, they’re wrong.
Qoxhi Picks: Washington Redskins (+7) over Los Angeles Rams